Dating & Flirting in French phrases and words in English
France's romantic reputation is real, but the actual language of flirting is funnier, slangier and more playful than the clichés suggest. From the verb everyone uses for hitting on someone, to the brutal art of getting stood up, these ten phrases give you the real vocabulary of French dating — texting a crush, sliding from 'vous' to 'tu', confessing you like someone, and surviving the modern app jungle. Learn them and you'll read the room like a local.
10 phrases · meanings & example sentences
“Draguer”
The essential verb for flirting or hitting on someone — and the noun 'la drague' is the whole art of it. Originally it meant 'to dredge' (as in dragging a net), which is a wonderfully cynical image for trawling for a date. A 'dragueur' is someone who flirts constantly. This single word unlocks almost every conversation about romance in French. Master it first; everything else is built on top.
- Il essaie de me draguer depuis une heure. — He's been hitting on me for an hour.
- T'es nul en drague, frérot. — You're hopeless at flirting, bro.
- Elle m'a dragué la première. — She made the first move.
“Pécho”
Verlan (backwards slang) for 'choper', meaning to pull, hook up with or kiss someone. It's casual, youthful and slightly cheeky — the word teenagers and twenty-somethings actually use. Because it's verlan, learning it teaches you how French slang is built by flipping syllables: 'choper' becomes 'pé-cho'. Use it with friends, not with your future in-laws. It captures the giddy, low-stakes side of French dating perfectly.
- Il a pécho à la soirée hier. — He pulled someone at the party last night.
- Tu crois que je vais pécho ce soir ? — Think I'll get lucky tonight?
- Ils se sont pécho devant tout le monde. — They made out in front of everyone.
“Tu me plais”
The most natural way to say 'I like you' romantically — but notice the grammar: literally 'you please me'. French doesn't say 'I like you' (that would be 'je t'aime', which means 'I love you' and is far too strong for a crush). Instead, the other person 'pleases' you. This little structural quirk is one of the most useful things to internalise about French: feelings often flow toward you, not from you.
- Je crois que tu me plais vraiment. — I think I really like you.
- Tu lui plais, ça se voit. — He likes you, it's obvious.
- Tu me plais, mais ça me fait peur. — I like you, but it scares me.
“Un rencard / un date”
Two words for a date. 'Un rencard' (or 'rencart') is the classic French slang — a planned romantic meet-up — while 'un date', borrowed straight from English, is what younger people increasingly say. Having both lets you read any French speaker, from your aunt to your Gen-Z cousin. 'Un rencard' can also just mean an appointment in older slang, so context matters. Either way, it's the word for the big evening out.
- J'ai un rencard vendredi soir. — I've got a date Friday night.
- C'était le pire date de ma vie. — That was the worst date of my life.
- On se fait un rencard cette semaine ? — Shall we go on a date this week?
“Poser un lapin”
To stand someone up — literally 'to put down a rabbit'. One of French's most charming idioms: nobody fully agrees why a no-show became a rabbit, but every French speaker knows the sting of 'se faire poser un lapin'. It's essential dating vocabulary precisely because dating goes wrong, and this is exactly how you describe the disaster. Bonus: idioms like this are memorable, so it'll stick the first time you hear it.
- Elle m'a posé un lapin, j'ai attendu une heure. — She stood me up, I waited an hour.
- Il pose toujours des lapins, méfie-toi. — He always flakes, watch out.
- Si tu me poses un lapin, c'est fini. — If you stand me up, we're done.
“Le coup de foudre”
Love at first sight — literally 'a strike of lightning'. It's the most romantic phrase in the French language and it's used sincerely: that instant, electric, knocked-off-your-feet feeling when you meet someone. The imagery (being hit by a lightning bolt) tells you everything about how the French frame falling in love — sudden, fated, overwhelming. Drop it and you sound effortlessly poetic, which never hurts on a date.
- Ça a été le coup de foudre direct. — It was love at first sight, instantly.
- Je crois pas vraiment au coup de foudre. — I don't really believe in love at first sight.
- Entre eux, ç'a été un coup de foudre. — Between them, it was instant love.
“On se tutoie ?”
'Shall we use 'tu'?' — a tiny question with huge social weight. French has two ways to say 'you': formal 'vous' and intimate 'tu'. Suggesting you switch to 'tu' is itself a flirtatious move, a way of saying 'let's drop the distance'. Few things teach you more about French intimacy than this moment. Getting to 'tu' is a relationship milestone; offering it first is bold and warm.
- On peut se tutoyer, non ? — We can use 'tu', right?
- Attends, on se tutoie déjà ? — Wait, are we on 'tu' terms already?
- Je te tutoie, ça te dérange pas ? — I'll use 'tu', that okay?
“Avoir le béguin”
To have a crush on someone — sweet, slightly old-fashioned and utterly charming. A 'béguin' was originally a kind of bonnet, and 'avoir le béguin' came to mean being soft-headed over someone. Younger people now also just say 'avoir un crush' (borrowed from English), so you'll hear both. The older phrase signals a gentle, blushing kind of liking — perfect for that early, fluttery stage before anything's been said.
- J'ai le béguin pour ma voisine. — I've got a crush on my neighbour.
- Avoue, t'as le béguin pour lui. — Admit it, you've got a crush on him.
- C'est juste un petit béguin, rien de sérieux. — It's just a little crush, nothing serious.
“Sortir avec quelqu'un”
To be dating or going out with someone — the standard way to say you're a couple, or becoming one. Literally 'to go out with', but it means being in a relationship, not just leaving the house together. 'Ça fait deux mois qu'on sort ensemble' = 'we've been together two months'. It's the workhorse phrase for the whole grey zone between a first date and 'in a relationship', so you'll use it constantly.
- Tu sors avec elle ou pas ? — Are you dating her or not?
- On sort ensemble depuis l'été. — We've been together since summer.
- Il paraît qu'ils sortent ensemble. — Apparently they're going out.
“C'est pas mon genre”
'That's not my type' — your polite (or not so polite) exit line, and its positive twin 'c'est tout à fait mon genre' ('that's totally my type'). 'Le genre' here means the kind of person you go for. It's the phrase friends use to gossip about who fancies whom, and the one you'll reach for to describe attraction. Flexible too: 'genre' can describe a type of person, a vibe, even a style. Pure everyday dating fuel.
- Il est gentil mais c'est pas mon genre. — He's nice but he's not my type.
- Elle, c'est carrément mon genre. — She's totally my type.
- C'est quoi ton genre, en fait ? — So what's your type, anyway?
